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Making my peace with egg whites

I've been very fussy about scrambled eggs all of my life. It's a trait I share with my mother and my youngest son, Patrick.

I love scrambled eggs. I have eaten them for breakfast almost every day of my life. Long before Atkins. And my cholesterol levels are excellent, thank you.

But they have to be cooked a certain way. Specifically, I want them to be whipped up furiously in a bowl, prior to heating them in a pan, such that the yolk and white are completely homogenized. Then I like to cook them very slowly while stirring constantly to avoid any white chunks appearing in the eggs. I usually blend some shredded cheddar cheese into the eggs while I am slowly cooking them to perfection. The result is scrambled eggs with a perfectly uniform color and texture. "No white crap," as Patrick puts it.

My fussiness about scrambled eggs has made it difficult to have them in restaurants or at others' homes, because invariably other cooks don't homogenize their scrambled eggs, so I am looking at this clumpy, unappetizing mess. I have coped with this problem by piling other people's scrambled eggs on toast and eating quickly. But sometimes people let their eggs sit far too long in the pan without stirring them, resulting in patches of singed, brown areas on the eggs. This triggers my gag reflex so violently that I simply cannot eat the eggs.

Needless to say, fried eggs have been pretty much out of the question. Ditto for boiled eggs.

But I have been getting better at tolerating carelessly stirred scrambled eggs. And I have learned to eat fried or boiled eggs, as long as I can chase them quickly with pancakes or toast. And yesterday I had some leftover salad that had a huge chunk of pure egg white in it.

So now I am purposely not stirring my scrambled eggs much, and I am okay with it.

But I still usually remove the chalazae before cooking. And I will not attempt to eat scorched, browned scrambled eggs (shudder).